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Eva illouz online dating

Eva illouz online dating


eva illouz online dating

June 21, Clodagh capitalism, feminism, gender studies, markets, okcupid, online dating, sex Leave a comment Eva Illouz argues in Cold Intimacies: The Rise of Emotional Capitalism that the commercialisation of intimacy has irretrievably changed the romance narrative and/or the ways in which we love and socialize Illouz argues that paradoxically people from online dating sites are considered as “real” and people from the “real world” seem to be more “virtual” The sociologist ex- plains this claim by stating that one cannot consider people that he or she meets everyday as potential partners because, in Eva Illouz. Imprint Berkeley: University of California Press, Physical description xv, p.: ill. ; 24 cm. Available online imagination of the nation and is built on images that unite amorous and economic activities in the rituals of dating, lovemaking, and blogger.com the early 's, advertisers have tied the purchase of



Eva Illouz: Capitalist subjectivity and the internet | HIIG



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By using our site, you agree to our collection of information through the use of cookies. To learn more, view our Privacy Policy. Log In Sign Up. Download Free PDF. Richard Sennett and Eva Illouz on tyranny of intimacy.


Intimacy tyrannized and intimacy as a tyrant. Maciej Musiał. Download PDF. Download Full PDF Package This paper. A short summary of this paper, eva illouz online dating. READ PAPER. Intimacy tyrannized and intimacy as a tyrant1 This paper discusses two accounts of tyranny of intimacy. The first account is pre- sented by Eva Illouz who analyses the way in which intimacy, which previously liberated from strict, traditional rules, has become disciplined and tyrannized by unintended consequences of eva illouz online dating discourse, feminism and technologies of choice.


In this sense, Sennett considers intimacy as a tyrant that disintegrates the public sphere. In this paper the approaches of both Illouz and Sennett are compared and analysed. In particular, Sennett and Illouz apparently describe the same process; yet, eva illouz online dating, while Sennett discovers it eva illouz online dating concerning the public sphere, eva illouz online dating, Illouz discusses it as affecting the intimate one.


It can be argued that the mechanisms which transformed the public sphere have spread to the intimate sphere causing similar results. It follows that the processes taking place in the middle of the twentieth century and described by Sennettappeared later on the ground of intimacy in the second half of the twentieth century and in the first decade of the second millennium and became analysed by Illouz. MACIEJ MUSIAŁ In the classical book entitled The Fall of Public Man2 Richard Sennett analyses the mechanisms that have led to diminishing of the public sphere in the Western culture.


He argues that the tyranny of intimacy is one of the most important contemporary factors which makes the public man falling. According to Richard Sennett, eva illouz online dating, intimacy has tyrannised the public sphere and, as a consequence, entailed its disintegration and a fall of a public man.


The fact that Sennett finds a source of this tyranny in psychology seems significant. The advent of modern psychology, and of psychoanalysis in particular, was founded on the faith that in understanding eva illouz online dating inner working of the self sui generis, without transcendental ideas of evil or of sin, people might free themselves from these horrors and be liberated to participate more fully and rationally in a life outside the boundaries of their own desires.


Masses of people are concerned with their single life-histories and particular emotions as never before; this concern has proved to be a trap rather than a liberation. Because this psychological imagination of life has broad social consequences, I want to call it by a name that may at first seem inapt: this imagination is an intimate vision of society.


But precisely because we have to come expect these psychological benefits throughout the range of our experience, and precisely because so much social life which does have a meaning cannot yield these psychological rewards, the world outside, the impersonal world, seems to fail us, seems to be stale and empty.


He is interested in how psychological logic affects the public sphere and argues that psychology promotes individual self and its authenticity as the key value, the meaning of life. Do I really mean it? Am I being genuine? Therefore, public problems are perceived as useless and irrelevant as long as they do not become directly connected with personality of a particular individual.


Consequently, issues do not exist as long as they are not the personal ones. Sennett, The Fall of Public Man, New York He perceives contemporary eva illouz online dating as stimulating for spread- ing of the self-centred attitudes.


He also argues that contemporary cul- ture holds the belief in the undisputable value of intimate warmth and closeness.


Contrary to intimacy, the public sphere appears cold and impersonal: The reigning belief today is that closeness between persons is a moral good. The reigning aspiration today is to develop individual personality through experiences of closeness and warmth with others.


The reigning myth today is that the evils of society can all be understood as devils of impersonality, alienation and coldness.


The sum of these three is an ideology of intimacy: social relationships of all kinds are real, believable, and authentic the closer they approach the inner psychological concerns of each person.


This ideology of intimacy transmutes political categories into psychological categories. It follows that, as Sennett argues, culture suggests individuals to participate in small and warm communities like families, rather than in bigger groups based on impersonal bonds like society. To summarise, Sennett argues that in the contemporary culture values such as the observation from neutral point of view or objective judgment are dimin- 6 Ibidem, p.


MACIEJ MUSIAŁ ished. They are treated as cold and not authentic practices that do not bring any benefit to an individual personality. Sennett claims that such an approach leads to a dangerous illusion that warmth, closeness, intimacy and authenticity are the answers for all important questions, and that they can help to dissolve any problem. Illouz discusses and labels some of such transforma- tions as tyranny of intimacy.


According to Illouz, eva illouz online dating, tyranny of intimacy is caused by three factors; namely, psychology, feminism and technologies of choice e.


the Internet. It should be noticed that these three factors are usually discussed as main causes of liberation eva illouz online dating democratisation of intimacy. Moreover, eva illouz online dating, Giddens emphasizes the importance of increasing the freedom of choice. Giddens, The Transformation of Intimacy: Sexuality, Love, and Eroticism in Modern Societies, Cambridge Gross, S.


Simmons, Intimacy as a Double-Edged Phenomenon? Weeks, The World We have Won: The Remaking of Erotic and Intimate Life, London, New York She argues that despite many differences feminism, psychology and technologies of choice share a number of important similarities, especially when it comes to their impact on intimacy.


The sociologist believes that psychology has produced therapeutic discourse that has a great and rather ambivalent impact on contemporary culture, especially on the intimate life. Whether psychoanalysis and psychotherapy intended to or not, they have provided a formidable arsenal of techniques to make us the verbose but inescapable bearers of responsibility for our romantic miseries.


Illouz, Saving the Modern Soul: Therapy, Emotions, and the Culture of Self-Help, Berkeley, Los Angeles, Londonp. Illouz, Why Love Hurts: A Sociological Explanation, Cambridge, Maldenp. MACIEJ MUSIAŁ Illouz strongly emphasizes the fact that methodological perspective of psy- chology is individualistic.


The consequence of abovementioned assumptions is that psychology considers an individual personality as the greatest value. An individual is the source of men- tal problems and mental health, so it should be the centre of every life plan. Illouz argues that psychology emphasizes the impor- tance of two main conditions of mental health, eva illouz online dating, that is, autonomy and permanent self-examination. Personal autonomy is understood as being relatively not too much dependent on anyone.


Being attached too much entails loosing autonomy, which, in turn, en- tails loosing mental health. Autonomy, authenticity, independence are the key values emphasised by therapeutic discourse. Actors ought to be able to describe their selves, their experiences and their emotions in neutral, scientific terms, and make themselves objects of studies and researches.


Furthermore, communicating emotions in inti- mate relationship by using the abovementioned rational and neutral terms is also important. Illouz, Cold Intimacies: The Making of Emotional Capitalism, Londonp. In other words, the fact that we increasingly have cultural techniques to standardize intimate relationships, to talk about them and manage them in a generalized way, weakens the capacity for closeness, the congruence between subjects and object, the possibility of fusion. When the relationship becomes increasingly generalized and intellectualized, love loses its unmediated character, and both the emotion and the object of love come to be interpreted in terms that are alien to the inner experience of the self.


In order to take care of individual autonomy actors should emancipate from too strong attachments to other people and ought to analyse and examine their own emotions in a neutral, scientific manner to become their own therapists. However, according to Illouz, psychology is not alone in being an unintended tyrant of intimacy because eva illouz online dating gains support from feminism and female emancipation movements.


The investigation of the way in which Illouz discusses the relations between psychology and feminism seems very interesting. The sociologist claims that, 19 Ibidem, p. It should be also mentioned that neither Giddens nor Illouz describes all kinds of feminism, but they rather choose a specific sort of feministic attitude.


Similarly, feminists of- ten stand against psychology and therapist discourse in general. This process can take place only when women carefully take themselves as objects of scrutiny, control their emotions, eva illouz online dating choices, and choose their preferred course of action, eva illouz online dating. Women should not sacrifice themselves for men and should not be unconditional- ly committed to them, eva illouz online dating, but rather ought to become autonomous and independent 21 Ibidem, p.


A similar analysis is presented by Arlie Russell Hochschild, The Commercialization of Intimate Life: Notes From Home And Work, San Francisco, Los Angeles Illouz, Cold Intimacies…, p. To achieve that, females are obliged eva illouz online dating analyse themselves and their intimate relationships and to investigate eva illouz online dating they are treated equally to men or not. According to feminism, women can liberate themselves by examining rules that regulate their family and intimate life, for instance, by measuring the share of housework done by them and their partners and by comparing their own will of sacrifice and commitment to analogous dispositions of their beloved ones.


Illouz claims that the impact of feminism and therapeutic discourse on inti- macy seem to be highly ambivalent and disturbing issue, in contrast to one-sid- ed positive evaluations of these two ideologies briefly sketched at the eva illouz online dating of this dissertation.


The alliance of psychology and feminism was unintended, but its effects surprisingly conflicted with the cult of authenticity and spontaneity that had dominated the s and s: the meeting of psychotherapy and feminism ultimately produced a new discipline of intimate bonds, which took the form of an increased use of the language of rights inside the bedroom, the prac- tice of self-observation and self-knowledge, and the injunction to work on and change relationships.


The feminist and therapeutic eva illouz online dating produced new emotional practices, entailing new ways of at- tending to emotions and new ways of using cultural categories and discourses to classify emotions, label them, explain them, and transform them.


To put this differently: feminism and therapy conjoined have been part and parcel of a vast process of disciplining the emotions inside eva illouz online dating private sphere.


They postulated the importance of spontaneity and authenticity in intimate life; yet, instead they produced rationalisation and procedural intimacy. They fought eva illouz online dating egalitarian and warm family bonds but they created cold intimacies, where commitment to others is considered as a source of oppression.


They wanted to liberate intimate life from strict regulations but they disciplined it with rational procedures of self-examination, labelling emotions and 26 E. MACIEJ MUSIAŁ measuring sacrifices. In this sense, psychology and feminism not only have led to emancipation, equality and freedom, but also have become tyrants of intimacy, eva illouz online dating, discipliners of love and family, rationalisators of love, coolers of passion.


Although, Illouz does not mention technologies of choice in the paragraph where she explicitly talks about tyranny of intimacy, in another place she strongly connects them with psychology and feminism by showing that they have similar unintended impact on intimate life.


Thus, it may be assumed that technologies of choice are discussed here eva illouz online dating the third tyrant of intimacy. The leading example of technologies of choice discussed by Illouz are online dating sites.





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eva illouz online dating

Eva Illouz. Imprint Berkeley: University of California Press, Physical description xv, p.: ill. ; 24 cm. Available online imagination of the nation and is built on images that unite amorous and economic activities in the rituals of dating, lovemaking, and blogger.com the early 's, advertisers have tied the purchase of Illouz views online dating as both promoting and promoted by the rationalisation of love, with marketing language, Internet technology, and an ideology of choice eroding earlier conceptions of blogger.comted Reading Time: 9 mins June 21, Clodagh capitalism, feminism, gender studies, markets, okcupid, online dating, sex Leave a comment Eva Illouz argues in Cold Intimacies: The Rise of Emotional Capitalism that the commercialisation of intimacy has irretrievably changed the romance narrative and/or the ways in which we love and socialize

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